Chak's Hello & introduction

Hello digimob!
I'll try to make a short introduction but this is inevitably impossible for myself so I'll try to keep the most important stuff in this first paragraph so you can skip the rest if you are so inclined. I like to talk about this kind of stuff but I really love to write from my keyboard. You'll undoubtedly find my replies extensive and highly opinionated. These opinions are however posted in a forum and not in a blog because I do truly wish to receive counterpoint and argument to my ideas. In other words, I love to argue. I do not however enjoy fighting.
I'm 25 and I started into occult studies about 8 years ago. I have always however been in pursuit of religious, theological, spiritual, and mental growth and development to better understand myself and the people I encounter in this world. I have Asperger's syndrome and manic depression. The exploration into altered states of mind through natural means and pharmacology has been something I have dealt with since childhood and have developed a fair amount of coherence and rationality within these altered states of mind. My introduction to entheogens and illicit pharmacology came about later, about 6 years ago. I'll save my opinions and experience there for that thread though. As a function of obsession I have been an avid reader of a variety of genre and topics both fiction & non-fiction and have a nigh insatiable desire for knowledge and understanding. This is more or less what led me to explore and study the occult and related areas.
An inability to communicate with others and develop typical empathic relationships and understandings in my childhood led me to seek sci-fi and fantasy in particular as a 'means of escape' from the world I could not understand or deal with. This mutated into a compensation of sorts as an obsession with language in and of itself as a means to communicate better. It has been effective at times but I still find that it is the same crutch it always has been. I have studied psychology toward the same endeavor and found the same thing. Helpful, but even still it cannot fully compensate for true empathy in and of itself.
In no uncertain terms I have come to realize that I almost completely lack empathy except in extreme and isolated incidents which I have been analyzing in an attempt to reproduce the ability (Yeah, I know....left brain compensation for a right brain activity). So while I may technically be a sociopath I have bound myself to certain laws of my own design (Through my own devised process of mental alchemy I will relate elsewhere later) to prevent myself from detaching so far from society and relationships that I destroy any potential for developing empathy and meaningful relationships.
These things have led me to develope an insanely comprehensive and deviant paradigm that very detailed and supported by logic and rationale criticized and reformed by experience and argument. I believe the most important details of this paradigm are that while I do not claim to be adept at any practice I have witnessed myself demonstrate self-limited power and believe that I have unlimited potential harness and restrained only by meaningful context and purpose. Although at some point I know even these must be redundant and disposed of for full potential to be realized.
Any questions of myself feel free to ask. I'm an open and honest as possible person. I believe in freedom of information to its' fullest extent. I support and use GNU for all my works and stand behind the movement itself as a philosphy. TIA for allowing me into this community and humoring me and my insanity!
-D

P.S. Chakravanti more or less means "Soul Slayer." Though a more detail explanation of this will be given in my explanation of my own developed personal Alchemy when and if I write and post it.

P.P.S. I just love being able to use the term 'Alchemy' and being able to reasonable expect people reading to generally understand what I mean. Anywhere else I would attempt to use the term I know would be meaningless beyond innuendo to ancient physical chemistry.

Thanks for the detailed, generous and open introduction.
Many welcomes.

For what it is worth, I think that living by a self imposed moral code, is a step beyond living by a socially imposed moral code.
kudos.

Welcome!

I just love being able to use the term 'Alchemy' and being able to reasonable expect people reading to generally understand what I mean. Anywhere else I would attempt to use the term I know would be meaningless beyond innuendo to ancient physical chemistry.

You can probably get a lot more obtuse than that around these parts.

Like Sir Humphrey? Eh, I've been there in my own private Mental Horizon Realm. It was a helpful mental deconstruction and alchemizing but I'm trying to translate my revelations into a meaningful and effective format.

Chakravanti wrote:Hello digimob!
I'll try to make a short introduction but this is inevitably impossible for myself so I'll try to keep the most important stuff in this first paragraph so you can skip the rest if you are so inclined. I like to talk about this kind of stuff but I really love to write from my keyboard. You'll undoubtedly find my replies extensive and highly opinionated. These opinions are however posted in a forum and not in a blog because I do truly wish to receive counterpoint and argument to my ideas. In other words, I love to argue. I do not however enjoy fighting.
I'm 25 and I started into occult studies about 8 years ago. I have always however been in pursuit of religious, theological, spiritual, and mental growth and development to better understand myself and the people I encounter in this world. I have Asperger's syndrome and manic depression. The exploration into altered states of mind through natural means and pharmacology has been something I have dealt with since childhood and have developed a fair amount of coherence and rationality within these altered states of mind. My introduction to entheogens and illicit pharmacology came about later, about 6 years ago. I'll save my opinions and experience there for that thread though. As a function of obsession I have been an avid reader of a variety of genre and topics both fiction & non-fiction and have a nigh insatiable desire for knowledge and understanding. This is more or less what led me to explore and study the occult and related areas.
An inability to communicate with others and develop typical empathic relationships and understandings in my childhood led me to seek sci-fi and fantasy in particular as a 'means of escape' from the world I could not understand or deal with. This mutated into a compensation of sorts as an obsession with language in and of itself as a means to communicate better. It has been effective at times but I still find that it is the same crutch it always has been. I have studied psychology toward the same endeavor and found the same thing. Helpful, but even still it cannot fully compensate for true empathy in and of itself.
In no uncertain terms I have come to realize that I almost completely lack empathy except in extreme and isolated incidents which I have been analyzing in an attempt to reproduce the ability (Yeah, I know....left brain compensation for a right brain activity). So while I may technically be a sociopath I have bound myself to certain laws of my own design (Through my own devised process of mental alchemy I will relate elsewhere later) to prevent myself from detaching so far from society and relationships that I destroy any potential for developing empathy and meaningful relationships.
These things have led me to develope an insanely comprehensive and deviant paradigm that very detailed and supported by logic and rationale criticized and reformed by experience and argument. I believe the most important details of this paradigm are that while I do not claim to be adept at any practice I have witnessed myself demonstrate self-limited power and believe that I have unlimited potential harness and restrained only by meaningful context and purpose. Although at some point I know even these must be redundant and disposed of for full potential to be realized.
Any questions of myself feel free to ask. I'm an open and honest as possible person. I believe in freedom of information to its' fullest extent. I support and use GNU for all my works and stand behind the movement itself as a philosphy. TIA for allowing me into this community and humoring me and my insanity!
-D

P.S. Chakravanti more or less means "Soul Slayer." Though a more detail explanation of this will be given in my explanation of my own developed personal Alchemy when and if I write and post it.

P.P.S. I just love being able to use the term 'Alchemy' and being able to reasonable expect people reading to generally understand what I mean. Anywhere else I would attempt to use the term I know would be meaningless beyond innuendo to ancient physical chemistry.

Hello back at you.